I probably do not know how to put across this draft concept that I have just yet, but I have to pen it down somewhere collectively with my other nonsense as I tend to forget such things. But anyways, thinking back, things hasn't been turning out right ever since I begin to think about things other than marbles and playgrounds, and more profusely so in recent years. Be it family, relationships, life goals etcetra, it seems that the causes of these problems have been because of my (perceived) bargaining power. It was that I was given priority, availabilty of substitutes and choice, that I abused my power as the king of a paper castle and neither committed my efforts to anything nor cherished anything. Rational behaviour has killed me this time.
And I guess there wasn't a mantra that I followed closely. The lessons I learned were all big, generic, utopian. It's time I gave myself one that is concise and relavant.
I say, "There's no substitute for what you believe in. Go for it now and nothing else." At least it sounds ok to me now. Like I've said, it's still a draft concept.
I don't care if what I believe in eventually isn't what I want, but at least I don't want to leave regrets. I don't care if it doesn't take me high; you don't need to climb a mountain to get a good view of how far you've come. You can travel laterally to see the same.
Finally, we will built that house together.
posted by Your masochist, Sunny @ 9/03/2009 11:07:00 PM
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